I hate Blogging.
I love writing. And I love having this space where I can publish what I write with the click of a button. I love that I can package my content in the design I choose. And I love that I can hear directly from my readers right here, where the content is.
“Um … Isn’t that Blogging?”
No, it’s blogging, which is totally different from Blogging. Blogging is blogging with a briefcase and a greasy salesman’s smile. It’s cubicle blogging. I hate everything about it, especially these 4 things that social media “experts” insist any self-respecting Blogger must do:
- Create Conversations I took this to mean “cultivate meaningful dialogue with readers‘. Isn’t it cute how I thought that? I’m pretty naive for a mistrustful, misanthropic ass. Because after all this time observing Good Bloggers and trying hard to become one myself, I now know that when the self-proclaimed experts advise you to
create conversations what they mean is ‘pretend to care about what other people think in order to manipulate readers into feeling personally invested in your content.’ - Stay Visible Facebook, Twitter, Google+, LinkedIn. Digg, StumbleUpon, Delicious, Reddit. Those are just a few of the social networking sites Good Bloggers
spamfrequent to promote theirlargely bad to mediocre crapawesome content. They also comment on other blogs (and then blog about the fact that they commented on another blog), write guest posts, link back to themselves in forums and otherwise make huge nuisances of themselves in an effort to keep the readers they have and wrangle in more. - Share the Love Social media marketing is really just a massive circle jerk. I know that’s a super gross metaphor but sadly, it fits. Take Twitter for example: a Good Blogger tweets links to other Bloggers’ content as well as their own. Then the linked Blogger should retweet it, with a hearty “thanks!” thrown in. This is supposed to be “networking” but really it’s just spamming your timeline with even more crap in hopes that you’ll get a new follower or a Klout point out of the deal.
- Publish Consistently You really should have a schedule if you’re going to be a Blogger. Your readers need to feel assured that they can rely on you to pony up your narcissistic bullshit in a timely manner. What will they do if they can’t read about yesterday’s appointment with your therapist while they’re having lunch, as usual? They’ll hate you, obviously. And they’ll unsubscribe and your Google Page Rank will dwindle down to nothing, nada, zero and you’ll die alone and unhappy and wearing unfashionable shoes.
In Other Words, Nothing – Not Even Your Content – Is As Important As Getting More and More and More Readers
It took me a long time to realize that no matter how palatably they’re presented, all of these things share one, excruciatingly boring purpose: increase readership. (I know, super duh.) And I guess I consider my readership a gift. I mean, I’m not curing cancer here. I’m sitting in my pajamas, munching on a pop-tart, and publishing my thoughts on a topic that doesn’t even concern most of the world. And I like it. It’s fun. But trying to get people to read what I write ? That’s not fun. It’s boring. And vain. And I hate it.
(But honestly, I’ve never heard any writer ever say, “Gee, you know what’s super fun? Promotion. The gimmicks, the networking, the whole nine yards. Gosh, it’s great!” Have you?)
So screw my Google Page Rank. (I think it’s like a 2 anyway, so not a lot to lose.) Twitter, Shitter. Not doing it. I dig Facebook and I actually use it regularly so that won’t change. But Holly, what about your Klout rating! LA LA LA DON’T CARE. Guest posts? Nope, not doing them. They stress me out and I always miss deadlines and then I feel like a huge douche. StumbleUpon? Google+? This is me, not caring:
This post is well over the stringently recommended 350-500 word count limit. But I don’t wear fashionable shoes anyway.
That’s why I could never get into blogging. Plus, I don’t feel like I’m very good with coming up with interesting topics on my own xD And even if I come up with a good topic, I can’t form it into a catchy, interesting post.
I like that your blog posts are semi!stream-of-consciousness, but way more coherent than my stream-of-consciousness.
Yes! So totally get this. I hate hate hate all the spam I get from bloggers trying to outdo each other. I blog when I have something to say not because if I forget for six months (guilty!) I will lose readers. and I dig the REAL communication with those that do read – the community. Thanks for reminding me its ok not to sell out like everyone else.
*laughs*… if I was blogging simply for getting people to read then I’m doing a very very VERY poor job. Does that make me a blogger, rather than a Blogger? Cool =P
Maybe it makes you a Senior Blogger or a Blogger Extraordinaire. I know some writers who do a good job marketing themselves but it never seems forced. And it’s obvious they’re more invested in their content than the marketing of their content. Alistair McHarg comes to mind. Of course, I think of him as a writer. I never think of him as a blogger, even though he blogs. Weird.
But I’m one of those tiresome people who takes themselves and everyone else too seriously. People like me should never be allowed to purposefully promote themselves. Otherwise they get very loathsome indeed.
http://www.alistairmcharg.com/
Have you ever peeked at my sister’s blog? It’s “officially” a poetry blog, and there is a good deal about poetry, but there’s also a good deal about other things and I think you might like it. She has a way with words and isn’t trite.
Link, please! I have no doubt she has a way with words … she’s YOUR sister!
I don’t even write ‘my’ blog.
*shrugs*
Without twitter though, I wouldn’t have got those 3 oh-so-important tweets I got from you, whenever I got them and whatever they said. I just know they were very important.
Keep blogging.
Xxx
I agree with everything you said on this. I love your blog – please keep doing what you are doing. It works for me.
I’ll read what you write here no matter how often you post, because I don’t think there is quality first person content out there like this blog! I certainly haven’t found it, and believability is something that’s been twisted and edited so much by mainstream “reality” stuff that It’s super refreshing to find a person willing to post things directly from their own mind and not edited and refreshed by someone else trying to appeal to a massive audience! I love the heart here!
I have to agree with the others, conformity you say, bah I say. I think that what is being said here and what do I call it blogged about is very important, as a newly diagnosised (spelling be damned) person with DID and complex PTSD I find the content informative and refreshing, and just a little entertaining at times. Not to say that I ever make lite of this problem or any who might have it. I have also suggested to my other half that she, if not subscribe but at least to read what is being talked about here for her information and to hopefully better understand what it is that we go through on a daily basis.